Random: Freedom

Recently, I watched a documentary on college entrance exam in China. It followed few different high school seniors throughout the year. The show present the lifestyle of these students who studied restlessly for the exam that would determine their future: college, career, and economic status. At the end of this documentary, one of the top high school graduated was quoted:

When I was studying so hard, I thought the most important thing was freedom.
You can't demand freedom from society, your school, or even from your own family.
You must rely on yourself to find your freedom.
If you can set your own heart free, then nothing can stop you.

-ZL

Upon hearing it, I thought to myself, "She got it right on the last two parts. But knowing what she just said, her life will filled with a struggle to be happy." When you free your mind and heart, freedom exist without any border, because any thought is possible, and any action can be taken. There is no limitation of choices.

So, why would her life will filled with struggle for happiness? Freedom often lack the long term fulfillment, because you are constantly refining the definition of freedom, constantly acting on the meaning of freedom, and constantly monitor yourself: behavior and thought. In doing so, you becomes someone beside yourself. Eventually there will a point where she will question herself, "what make me, a physical body with mind and emotion, an individual self with freedom?" This unsettling question has no right or wrong answer. It can be solved only when she is satisfied with her own answer. But even with a conclusive answer, her happiness is not assured.

Freedom is not just about making decisions on choices defined by society. Freedom is the ability to think and reason the choices, to determine the best solution regardless of whether it's unique or common, and to act upon it. Freedom in this sense is not so easy or absolute. Actually, it is a hard work, and quite complex, because your philosophy and ideology come into play.

Ignorant is a bliss.

Many have said it, and I agreed with it. At least they are not questioning themselves time after time until the end of their lives.